Why Does the Ego Keep Coming Back?
- Sukhdev Virdee
- Jul 12
- 3 min read
You’ve seen through it.
You’ve felt the weight of “me” dissolve.
You’ve had moments of stillness where nothing remained—
no thinker, no doer, no separate self.
And then, out of nowhere…
It returns.
You find yourself caught in the story again.
Reacting.
Defending.
Craving.
Fearing.
You wonder:
“Why does the ego keep coming back?”
“Am I doing something wrong?”
“Haven’t I already seen through this?”
Let’s look together—without shame, without spiritual fantasy.
Because the answer is not in resisting the ego.
It’s in seeing it clearly, again and again.
The Ego Is Not a Thing — It’s a Pattern
What we call “ego” is not an entity.
It’s not a villain hiding inside you.
It’s a bundle of habits — mental, emotional, energetic.
A collection of stories and strategies
that formed over years to help you survive, relate, succeed, defend.
It's a movement of thought:
“I am this body. I must protect myself. I need to be seen, understood, praised.”
And like any old pattern,
it doesn’t vanish because you’ve seen through it once.
It runs on momentum.
Think of it like a wheel that's been spinning for decades.
Even after you remove the force behind it,
it may still turn for a while—
out of habit, out of conditioning.
This is not failure.
It’s just physics.
Ego Persists Because Identification Persists
The ego only exists in one way:
When you believe the thoughts it produces.
That’s it.
When a thought like “They don’t respect me” arises…
it’s just a thought.
But when you believe it,
grasp it,
react to it—
the ego seems to come alive again.
Not because it returned,
but because you gave it your attention.
The ego never actually leaves or returns.
Only identification arises and subsides.
Awakening is not about making the ego disappear.
It’s about no longer being fooled by it.
The Ego Will Use Anything—Even Spirituality
One of the ego’s most clever disguises is the “spiritual ego.”
It wears mala beads.
It quotes scriptures.
It speaks of surrender, silence, and God.
But underneath it still whispers:
“I’m more awake than others.”
“My realization is deeper.”
“I must protect my image as a spiritual person.”
So don’t look for the ego only in obvious places.
It hides in subtleties.
In your need to be seen as humble.
In your fear of being misunderstood.
In your craving for confirmation from other seekers.
Bring awareness even here.
Especially here.
The Mind May Speak—But Are You Listening?
The mind will always throw thoughts at you.
This is not a problem.
The only question is:
Who is listening?
If you take the thought personally—“This means something about me”—
you enter the loop.
If you simply notice—“Ah, another wave”—
you remain as the ocean.
This is the difference between relapse and liberation.
Not what thoughts appear,
but whether you climb into them and call them me.
You don’t have to silence the ego.
You only have to stop mistaking it for yourself.
Don’t Try to Kill the Ego — Just Stop Feeding It
Trying to destroy the ego becomes another ego project.
It says,
“I must conquer this.
I must get rid of it.”
But the very one who wants to “get rid of the ego”…
is the ego itself, dressed in white robes.
What happens if you simply let it be?
Don’t resist it.
Don’t suppress it.
Don’t follow it.
Let it come.
Let it speak.
And let it pass.
Like a cloud passing through a vast, unmoving sky.
That sky… is what you are.
The Ego Comes and Goes — You Don’t
Sometimes, the ego appears strong.
Sometimes, it’s barely noticeable.
But whether it's present or not—
You are still here.
The Witness of the ego is untouched by the ego.
That witnessing presence is your true nature.
It has no form, no story, no identity.
And the more you rest as that,
the more the ego quiets on its own.
Not because you forced it…
but because it has no more fuel.
When there's no belief in the thought,
the thought falls.
When there's no resistance to the ego,
the ego loses its power.
🌿 Let the Ego Arise — And Watch It Dissolve
You don’t need to panic when old patterns arise.
You don’t need to judge yourself when the ego speaks.
Simply see it.
With clarity.
With kindness.
With silence.
The Self does not resist the ego.
It sees through it.
And that seeing is the beginning of real peace.
The 5 Illusions That Keep You from Awakening – And The One Truth That Sets You Free
One of those illusions is the belief that “ego must be destroyed.” Let’s unravel that together.
If you're tired of fighting the ego and ready to rest in the truth of what you are, I'm here to walk with you.
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