Why Does the Ego Keep Coming Back?
- Sukhdev Virdee
- Jul 3
- 3 min read
You’ve had the insight.
You’ve touched silence.
You’ve rested in the deep stillness of Presence.
Then… the ego returns.
It’s back with its familiar tricks—
judgment, craving, fear, doubt.
And you wonder:
“Did I lose my awakening?”
“Why does this ‘me’ keep showing up again?”
“When will it finally be gone?”
Let me tell you the truth gently:
The ego never really goes anywhere.
What changes is your relationship to it.
Ego Is Not the Enemy
Ego is not a demon to be slain.
It’s not a mistake.
It’s not some evil force holding you back.
The ego is simply a movement of mind—
a habit of identification.
It says: “I am the body. I am my past. I am what others think of me. I am what I’ve achieved.”
It’s not a being.
It’s a belief.
And beliefs can arise…
without being believed in.
That’s the key.
The Goal Is Not Ego Death, But Ego Transparency
Some seekers are waiting for the day
when the ego vanishes completely—forever.
But that's a misunderstanding.
Even the awakened sage
experiences thoughts of “I,”
but they no longer cling to them.
The ego becomes transparent—
like a window that no longer blocks the light.
It may appear…
but you see through it instantly.
You no longer identify with it.
You no longer fear it.
You no longer follow it.
It becomes just another cloud
in the sky of your being.
Why the Ego Keeps Arising
Because it's a habit.
Because you've practiced it for years.
Because it's embedded in your nervous system.
Even after awakening, the old thought-patterns echo.
And that’s okay.
Realization is not the end of thought.
It’s the end of believing thought is “you.”
When you see that clearly,
the ego can arise and fall
without disturbing the Peace you are.
It’s like an old friend who talks too much.
You smile,
but you no longer listen.
You Don't Need to Fight the Ego — Just Stop Feeding It
Trying to “kill” the ego only strengthens it.
The more you resist it,
the more real it becomes.
But when you see it arise
without reaction,
without judgment,
without engagement…
…it begins to lose its grip.
And what remains
is a vast openness—
a silent Presence
that was always here.
This is the true path:
Not war, but watching.
Not control, but clarity.
Let the ego arise.
Let it dance its dance.
But stay rooted
in what doesn’t come and go.
The Ego Comes Back Because You Look for It
This is subtle.
Sometimes you search for the ego
to make sure it’s gone.
You ask:
“Was that thought from the ego?”
“Was that desire egoic?”
“Is this choice coming from the Self?”
But in doing that…
you energize the very thing you want to transcend.
Let thoughts come.
Let actions unfold.
You don’t need to trace their source.
Stay with the seeing.
Stay as Awareness.
The moment you turn inward with clarity,
the ego becomes weightless—
like a dream remembered in daylight.
The Self Doesn’t Mind the Ego
This is freedom:
When the ego no longer troubles you.
It can rise.
It can speak.
It can even scream…
…but you no longer take it personally.
You are the sky—
the ego is weather.
You are the ocean—
the ego is a wave.
You are the light—
the ego is a flicker on the wall.
And so, even if it arises a thousand times,
you remain at peace.
Because you are not the ego.
You never were.
🌿 You Are Already Free — Even With the Ego Present
Awakening doesn’t make the ego vanish.
It simply reveals it as unreal.
And once that’s seen,
you stop struggling.
You relax.
You stop waiting for perfection
and begin living from Presence.
Right now.
As you are.
Ego and all.
🌟 Let’s Go Deeper Together
The 5 Illusions That Keep You from Awakening – And The One Truth That Sets You Free.
Let this guide dissolve the false beliefs you didn’t know you were carrying.
For when you’re ready to stop chasing ego death, and start living from the Truth that never leaves.